Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen

While both my children seem to be natural born performers, Wiseguy showed that he has a knack for the spoken word. He proved this more than ever on Father's Day. We were visiting my dad and stepmother (AKA Opop and Omom) and remembered that SmartyPants had her recorder in the van. Since Omom and Opop had never heard her play in person she wanted to perform a few songs for them and did so quite well, as per usual. Of course, WiseGuy wasn't going to be left out of the spotlight and stood beside her providing percussion throughout her performance. While it was funny to watch him try to muscle in on her performance I was also surprised that his percussion accompaniment was on beat and fit perfectly with her playing. When SmartyPants had completed her songs WiseGuy decided to sing for us. At least that's what he said. Instead he took on the role of MC and explained many things to us about what was going on 'up there on stage.' He gave out 'prizes' to us all. I was the lucky winner of a pink car and ONE HUNDRED MILLION THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!! WOOOOOOO!!!! We each received our share of the world's money and our own cars. After much talking and introduction he decided to introduce his sister again and this time she would sing. It took about 10 minutes to get him off 'the stage' at which time he informed us all that he would be going to 'the other stage' while she performed her songs. As she started singing we all suddenly heard, from the other side of the room, 'Well hello everybody!' There was WiseGuy doing his shtick on on the other stage. SmartyPants finished the 'It's Saturday!' review (the musical she had a role in at school this past year) and WiseGuy returned to do some standup, telling jokes that just WEREN'T jokes, but you HAVE to laugh for him, anyway. My dad said it was Andy Kaufman-esque and would probably entertain a number of people if we really did put him on stage. He had us almost in tears for about 45 minutes. It was priceless, to say the least.
Now, what I wonder is, would he do this in front of a GROUP of people? Or did he only do it because he was in front of family? I suppose only time will tell. All I know is that I am glad he does it for me.

Happy Mother's Day

As per usual, the kids made Mother's Day gifts in school to bring home for me. WiseGuy's teacher had a form that she filled in after asking the kids questions. WiseGuy's answers made me laugh and cry. I've posted it below. The phrases in pink were the answers given by WiseGuy.

My mother is the most wonderful mom in the whole world!
She's as pretty as a boat. (that's a compliment from a five year old boy, to be sure!)
She weighs 33 lbs. (I WISH!)
She is 16 feet tall. (Combine that with my weight and I'm a STICK!)
Her favorite food is salad. (Not quite, but it SOUNDS great)
I think my Mom looks funny when she tells jokes. (And here I thought I only SOUNDED funny)
But I know she is really angry when she tells me to clean up. (Naturally!)
I wish Mom would go to the movies with me every day. (I would have to get a second job to afford THAT these days)
My Mom's best friend is [SmartyPants] and me. (Of course!)
Her favorite TV show is Funniest Animals. (Who can resist funny animals?!)
She can cook noodles the best. (I'm a noodle QUEEN!)
I would like to buy her a golden star. (AWWWW!!!)
I wouldn't trade my Mom for a diamond. (THAT line made me CRY!)

I love that little man of mine!

Hope all of the mom's out there have a wonderful Mother's Day!

Funny Quotes From The WiseGuy

My 5 year old son says some of the FUNNIEST things that I've ever heard come out of the mouth of a child. Below are just two of the most recent.
Last night we were out at a pizza buffet and WiseGuy didn't want to eat. He loves to drink and would choose to have a drink over eat a meal any day. Last night I tried and tried to get him to eat some pizza to which he responded,

"I'm full up with food but I'm down wit drinkin'!"

I almost choked on my cheese!

Quite some time ago we were having some behavior problems with WiseGuy in school, getting notes from the teacher almost everyday. We were stressing to him the importance of making good choices and how they impact the people around him. One day when he came home from school we asked if he made good choices. He replied,

"Yeah, I made good choices.....in my head."

That boy is a real piece of work!